i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
