The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
You had me at "let me see your balls"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
