who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
