her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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