The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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