their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
