she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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