Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
