Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
