her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
