When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
