Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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