I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize