You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
they need to just BURY HIM!
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Randomize
