Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Hippo gnu deer
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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