I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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