Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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