first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
