I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
