i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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