Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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