even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
