So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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