i jhust puked up my retainher.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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