I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
