Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
