Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
