At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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