i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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