i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
