He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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