whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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