Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
