She said her name was "party"
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
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