You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
