Fuck appropriateness.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
