Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
