i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
