Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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