P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
