you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Come back. Shots need mouths.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
