How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Randomize
