He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
