She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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