Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
