I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
