Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
