We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
