you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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