am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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