I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
