So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
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